Life Purpose: Objections, Discomfort and Other Perspectives

Posted on 16. May, 2009 by Emmanuelle Archer in Blog, Tools & Resources
2 comments

As mentioned yesterday, identifying your life purpose is one of those worthy, ambitious projects that can elicit a fair share of resistance and quite a few objections.

Knowing your own purpose in life is such an important foundation for your happiness, though, that I want to take some time here to look at the most common objections.

Objection #1: I am not worthy!

When you heard about life purpose, maybe your first reaction was, “Wait a minute. Sure, people like Mother Theresa and Buddha had a clear purpose in life, but I am a normal person, you know? I am not going to save the world.”

That is a very valid point of view. Looking for your life purpose can sound intimidating, or grandiose, or something that is only for extraordinary people to pursue.

Here are two ways to look at it:
- First, take a moment to notice where your discomfort is coming from. Could it be that the voice in your head telling you, “Life purpose? I don’t think so!” belongs to your Inner Critic? That it is, in essence, saying, “You’re not good enough to have a life purpose”? If so, well, that is a rather crummy thing to say – but Inner Critics are like that, alas. Not really team players. You can take a look here for techniques to get your Inner Critic out of the way.

- Now if it is the words themselves that you find distracting – just change them! No one ever said that that this thing we are after must be called a life purpose. What we are looking for is who you are meant to be and what you are meant to do in this lifetime.

A coach I work with calls it her “unique purpose”. One of my clients defined it as “her calling”. I like to think of it in terms of “what gives my life meaning and keeps me going”. Play with different words until you come up with something you are really comfortable with.

Objection #2: If I had a life purpose, I’d know it by now!

Another thought that may have crossed your mind is, “If I had a life purpose, wouldn’t I have found it by now?“
Oh, I hear you. I used to think the exact same thing – that a life purpose would surely be such an obvious calling that I would know it by the time I was 4 or something. Then I remembered that the Buddha himself only found his calling at age 29 and I got over it.

Sometimes, callings are subtle – a whisper, a twinge. It is easy to miss them if we are constantly busying ourselves with other things. The good news is that because they are part of your essence, callings are constant and persistent. A little of your time and attention is all they need to express themselves.
Just like some people with no obvious talents as a child find their artistic wings later in life, you can uncover your life purpose at any age.

Objection #3: What if I don’t believe life has a purpose?

This is another perspective that I would like to acknowledge. Maybe you have a more nihilistic take on life and believe that life is without real meaning or purpose. Maybe you are an atheist and the idea of life purpose makes you uncomfortable, because it seems to imply an underlying religious or spiritual angle.

I want to reassure you that we are not looking for the universal “meaning of life”, but rather for the specific, overarching theme that will give you, as a person, direction in life. Another way to put it could be “the most important mission you will give yourself during your lifetime”. So everyone, including atheists, can successfully use the tools I gave you yesterday.

On the other hand, if you are religious, one of the most powerful questions you can ask yourself is “What did God/the Divine put me on this earth for?”, as it will take you straight to the essence of your life purpose.

Does this help?

I hope this clears up most of the uneasiness you may have had around the concept of life purpose.
If you are still struggling to find the right words, or if you have further questions, that is what I am here for – leave a comment and I will get back to you ASAP!

Emmanuelle